Blog Series for 2018

I know I haven’t been as active as I would like and I apologise for that with all my heart. I try my best to write and schedule posts when I can but I know I have been failing slightly on that front. That is why I have decided to open a series for this year that talks about my past adventures and things I have already discovered but haven’t shared with anyone. This probably defeats the purpose of this whole blog but right now, I feel compelled to write about the little things I still remember (before adulting fully takes over).

This series (still deciding on the name) will start on the 25th of February which marks my one year anniversary of The Undiscovered Adventures. It will talk about past relationships, friendships, conflicts etc… that are part of my life and the reason I made this blog in the first place. I have always been a quiet person and an introvert but I pride myself on being creative and I love telling stories. I have always wanted to do big things but recently I have come to realise that in order to do big things, I need to remember the small things first. I want to tell you my story on this platform, on my blog. I want to re-live my life as a 21 year old looking back on her life so far. I think that personally I am at the stage of my life where I tend to feel stuck and start to wonder more and more if maybe this is all life has for me but I can feel that there are so many opportunities available for me and many more adventures to discover and I can’t wait to see what’s to come.

So, please come and join me in revisiting past untold stories and finding out how these now discovered stories defined me, a 21 years old aspiring blogger who is going to make big things happen! Watch this space.

Peace and Love ✌🏽❤️

Trisha xox

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Gratitude Board

I have been meaning to post this for a long time but I keep forgetting lol. On November 25 2017, I started a Gratitude Board for myself after my mum suggested it for my sister, Vanessa. I decided to steal the idea because I recently have been feeling down and I don’t really know why. I also felt that I have so many things that I should be grateful for that I don’t realise in the moment because I get overwhelmed easily. So, the gratitude board will help me recognise the little things in life and have something to look forward to at the end of the day.

I am currently on Day 78 today and I will keep you posted on how it’s going once in a while but I am planning on doing the gratitude board for a whole year or maybe even more. So I will update on it once in a while to discuss my gratitude progress.

Let me know if you have ever done a Gratitude Board or Journal before and what are some of the things you are currently grateful for.

Someone Loves You

There are lessons we need to learn
Yet we need the money to earn
So we can buy and we can strive
Living a life to prove we can survive
We grew older wishing we were small
Knowing that every step could lead to a fall
A fall that a kiss or a plaster cannot fix
And then having to inspect our bag of tricks
For a miracle or a hope, for our dream
Why can all we hear is the scream
Of our thoughts crying in pain
Of our hearts going insane
From all the feelings we have suppressed
Then people asking why are we depressed
They don’t understand what goes in our mind
Of all the dangerous moments that follows us behind
How we quiver in conflict and avoid fear
How we fake a smile and stop the tear
That could flood the bath and our lungs
How we drunk the bleach more than once
The times we held a knife or the rope
Praying for a single strand of hope
To take our hand and away from the edge
Of the glass, the pills or the ledge
To tell us that it will be okay
That one day the anxieties will go away
But for now, know that you and I are not alone
Please speak to someone and dial a number on your phone
Yesterday, Today or Tommorrow may not seem fine
But please talk to someone on the suicide helpline.


We all have anxieties and are going through a lot in our lives that can seem overwhelming. Please know that someone loves you and would be happy to listen to whatever you are going through, even if it is some stranger on the phone. There are a lot of information on the numbers you can call to reach the suicide helpline team in your country.

You are not alone, even if it feels like that now. You are loved. 

 

I’m Glad You Found Someone Else… Cause It Wasn’t Meant To Be.

What I learned from a Job Interview Everyone Else Wanted For Me

Yay, I graduated but now what? The question that goes through my mind (and hopefully other graduates’ minds) once they have walked the stage and gotten that piece of paper. What am I gonna do now that ai have gotten a degree? I hated to think about it but damn, I should have really thought about it sooner. But I have never been a decisive person and making decisions takes a lot of planning. Of course, I have a job now and I really enjoy working there as it is minimum hours and a late start (but it also means minimum wages). As much s you love a job, you also need the money to survive and buy necessities like shaving cream and driving lessons (yes I know, I still haven’t booked those yet but that’s for another blog post!). So, I have been looking at other job options that are part-time that I can do alongside my current job role.

I found several jobs in the local area and out of the ten jobs I applied for, one came to the forefront and we clung to it. The job was at a great location, at a top-notch building and the pay was something anyone would have jumped at. They have shortlisted me and invited me in for an interview. Everyone was very excited and of course, I was too (as well as nervous). They all wanted this job for me and my sister kept telling me “You better at this, Trisha”. But as you know from the title of this blog post, I didn’t get it.

At first, I was disappointed and upset that they didn’t pick me and I couldn’t get the reasons why. I doubted myself and looked up articles on my employers don’t pick you. I looked over my preparation (which wasn’t that great if I’m honest as I had higher priorities in my mind at the time) and then looked at alternative scenarios I could have done differently. Maybe I should have been selfish and focused on my interview preparation rather than spending my time making Vanessa’s surprise birthday as best as she deserves to have. Maybe if I didn’t spend so much money on it, I wouldn’t be looking for another job or maybe I should have forfeited my own sister’s happiness so I can get a job that pays more. But I know deep down, I didn’t want that. Vanessa deserves a lot (even if she is mean sometimes) and I won’t ever sacrifice someone’s happiness just so I can have more money. After all, happiness or money doesn’t grow on trees and money doesn’t make you happy, your family does.

Besides, as good as the job sounded it probably wouldn’t have lasted anyways because I know that this was the first interview where I showed my true self. I shared my opinions and was the most talkative I have ever been in my job interviews so far. I answered the questions with honesty and creatively. I admitted my faults and highlighted my ability to be humble and approachable. But in the end, my lack of customer experience and skills let me down. Well (not to sound bitter or salty) but I think that it really wasn’t meant to be and I am so relieved that they found the right person to suit that position and it wasn’t me.

After I got the rejection email, I stared at it and I felt disappointed that I didn’t get it and the first thing I thought was that “you idiot Trisha! You let them down”. I was so upset that my family will be upset but deep down I ended up crying in relief because as much as they would have wanted me to have that job, in truth I didn’t want it. So it didn’t matter what went wrong or what I could have done differently because a part of me knew I wasn’t going to be happy there. This was just like a relationship that you tried to make work but you knew that it wasn’t the highest priority so you clung onto it hoping it will work out in the end but it just wasn’t meant to be. You go through what went wrong and you come to the conclusion that if they are not going to appreciate you for qualities you have then thank the Lord, he didn’t will for it to continue any further and you can move on.

This was definitely a learning experience and I will wholeheartedly take all their feedbacks on board. I wish them all the best. As much as this may cause some sadness, I’m glad I didn’t allow myself to settle for something far less than I deserve.

~You will be rewarded with a Great Honour~

Today, I am going to be graduating with a FIRST CLASS HONOURS!!! I still cannot believe it that I got a First Class grade.When I first saw it, I couldn’t quite process it that I got a 69.83% (which just barely made the first class grade) and the words next to it had First Class Honours. I just kept staring at it and shaking my head and I was really speechless. I never thought I would see those words on the screen. I was very certain that I would get a 2:1 because I calculated it over and over again (hoping it would be a 1st class) but finally accepting that I shouldn’t have even thought about getting a high grade and I am just happy with a 2.1. I already told a lot of my family members that I will get a B and soon I was confident that I would get a 2.1 (which secretly made me feel disappointed) but I moved on and just accepted it.

But those words on the screen when I saw it really brought tears to my eyes. The three years have been a huge adventure and like I said before, it wasn’t the easiest or the most fun thing you could do in your life (at least for me lol)  but I took it as a chance to prove myself that I can do it and grow. I didn’t really get high grades so I wasn’t looking for the top grade at all and most of the lecturers/ tutors warned us that not a lot of people will get firsts, so I didn’t have high hopes for myself. I cruised through the first year and in the second year and cruised even further in my third year, hoping for at least a 2.1. As a person who also missed out on things, I like to keep to myself and just jump hoping to land safely at least a metre from the edge and I treated university the same way. I did my best and if it wasn’t enough then I had to accept it and move on. I never shared my grades with anyone (unless they ask) but it always plays over and over again in my mind that I will never get a top grade and that always stayed with me until the results day. I still cannot believe I got a First Class Honour!

Getting this grade means so much to me for several reasons. Firstly, as I mentioned above, I am not the person who was highly praised for being academically smart and most of my grades especially A-Levels was so crap. I even had my doubts if I will even make it into university. But now, I have officially finished on a high note and I couldn’t have been more proud of myself. After all the stress, crying, headaches and sleepless nights, I can now breathe a sigh of relief that I am officially finished with all the essays and I am officially finishing with a First Class Honours. All those times, I stood people up and told them I was too busy to meet them (cause I was doing some last minute essays lol), the times I shut myself in my room and forced Vanessa to stay with me during some of my all-nighters so I would have some company, the times she was annoying and told me ‘It will be fine, Trisha’ and ‘You need to calm down!’ (which followed with a pillow to her face and on one occasion I dug my nails into her arms- I said I was sorry and you can barely see the scarring hahaha) and the times I handed every essay in thinking that it is the best I could and it is up to God what grade I get. I am one of those people who doubted herself constantly and worried so much about the future but always kept it to myself cause I don’t want to bother people. People would tell me it would be fine and I will nod my head (even if deep down I doubt it will be lol) and just get on with things. I never thought of the possibility of getting a first in anything and even though I would get excited when I got a first in some of my essays, I tell myself that I need to tone down the excitement so I won’t be disappointed. But damn, I did it and got an unexpected First Class Honours.

Another reason this means so much to me is that getting a high grade means I have ticked off one of the things on my bucket list, which is graduating from university and graduating with the highest grade possible. I know that going to university is a privilege as my parents always tell us, education is something people cannot take away from you and something you can never lose. So many people dream of going to university and they cannot afford to, so I feel so blessed that I stuck with it and finished university. I know this also means so much to my family that I am going to be graduating and there are not enough words I can write and say to thank them enough for quietly supporting me.

To my parents, thank you for always pushing me to be the best I could be and showering me with all the things I want and need. My parents work so hard every day to earn money to pay for all the necessities of life and they never wanted anything back except the promise from us to work hard and be a good person. Nothing can ever repay the unconditional love my parents have given me all my life but I hope now that I am going to be graduating, I can share with them the pride of this great accomplishment and a toast to the start of a fruitful future that they have always believed I would have.

To my sisters, firstly to Vanessa, you have always been annoying and we have had a lot of fights and I am sure there are still more to come. You have always made fun of me (mostly about my ex-boyfriends) but you have also brought some fun into my life by being my volunteer PA by bringing all my stuff for me up and down the stairs. Even if I injured you in the process or told you to be quiet, I always appreciated your encouraging words and your willingness to help me realise that I can do it! To Beatrice, thank you for helping me make peace with my inner child. With all the stress, I was always so serious about getting things done to prove that I have become an adult but with all the times spent with you, you have helped me take a break from being all grown up and watch cartoons and play childish games I have missed so much (plus it gave me a reason not to do my essays).

To all my aunts, uncles and cousins, you have always been there with supportive advice and compliments and even if we do not get to see or speak to each other as much as we would like, I know you are cheering me on with great enthusiasm. To all my Lolas, you have taken care of me since I was little and watched me grow into the person I am now. You have passed on your wisdom to my parents and they have passed it on to me and that has helped shaped my values on life and the power of prayer. I know we don’t go to church as much as we should but I also know that all of you always pray for me, for my health, my happiness and for my studies. I am so glad that both of our prayers have been answered and I am graduating with the highest honours. I will send some pictures over so I can share the blessings that God has given me. To my late Lolo Al and Lolo Ramon, I am so sad that you can’t see me graduate but I hope you are looking down on me and are very proud.

To all the few friends that stuck with me since childhood and until now, thank you so much for making me realise the power of friendship and I appreciate all the support you have given me (even though I didn’t get to meet up or hang out as much as you would have liked me to come and meet up). I will try and make an effort to come hang out more hahaha. To all the friends I met at university, you have been amazing and I am sure our paths will cross again and you will go on to greater things. To all the lecturers that taught me, you have opened my eyes and ears about social issues from theories that seemed like from many years ago (that I would have normally not even realised existed or wanted to read) but those lessons will stay with me in my mind and has not only made me wiser but full of curiosity to discover more. 

After today I would be officially ending my university life with the highest grade and closing a huge chapter of my life. I cannot wait to see what the future has install for me. Let us toast to more undiscovered adventures that are now waiting to be discovered. 

Peace and Love, 

Trisha xo

Determined

So many things have changed I have lost count
So many things to do and it’s starting to mount
Changes have come and doors start to open
The time has passed and so much has happened
Life has been hectic I had to run to keep up
Gotta keep on running until I reach the top
Now I am here there is no chance of slowing
Too much perseverance gotta keep on going!

The Best of Three Years

The three years that I have done at university will soon be officially over as the results come in and graduation is just three months away. I would say that I will miss it but to be honest there really isn’t much to miss except a few people who really made a difference in my life. That is probably a little harsh but it is the truth and they did say that the truth will set you free. While I have been waiting for the official results to come in from the academic board, I have been occupying myself with looking for jobs and spending some time with my family. I thought that the results would still be far away when I was looking towards the future all the way in May and now it is only a few more days before I find out what the undergraduate degree grade I will be receiving in October. Everyone has been so excited and all my relatives have been really supportive of all the things I have achieved in the last three years. This has made me really positive too and that is why I printed out all my essays that are 70% (A grades) and above so I have a physical memory of the great things I have gained whilst at university. 

I never thought I would get any A’s when I first started university after doing my A-Levels. My time at Sixth Form was okay but if I were to choose if I would rather do another five years of secondary school or even 2 more years at university then I would have gladly agreed. My grades at A-Levels wasn’t the best compared to other people and I just barely made it through to the second year and when it all finished I was so convinced and paranoid that I won’t pass my A-Levels (so paranoid that I started looking at other options and sorting out all the things that are needed for clearance). But when I woke up on results day, my first and second choice university have accepted me and even though my results were crap, I have made it into university. Phew!

Three years on from that, I am now sitting in my living room and typing this blog post and finally breathing a sigh of relief. University was one of the most stressful, headache-causing and nerve-wracking thing I have ever done so far in my life. The essays were an effort to get through, I had a lot of practical work I had to complete alongside it and I was always crying from anxiety and lack of sleep. But even if it was a terrible experience, I gained a lot of things in the process. I gained a lot of true friends that I hope I can stay in touch with for the rest of my life, some amazing tutors/lecturers who I have grown to like and those who have supported me throughout the three years. I have learnt about who I am as a person as well as a student. I have learnt A LOT about media theory, politics, journalism, web design, the economy and basically all the things that relate to media and those that doesn’t. I have made some great memories with my family and the most important thing of all, I did it all on my own. I survived university and lived to tell the tale. I conquered mountains of essays and practical work, spoke in front of a lot of people when doing presentations and got through the three years with an excellent outcome. 

That is why as a way of marking the end of university and getting the results that I thought would have been impossible to get three years ago, I have printed all my first class essays to celebrate the end of a stressful yet gratifying chapter of my life. I want to look back on them one day and maybe show myself as well as my future children how I did what I and others thought would have been impossible for me to do. I am so incredibly proud of myself and now I have several pieces of evidence of the rewards you can get and the satisfying feeling you get when you know you got something better than you thought you would actually get!