Take Your Time: It’s your Story

We want answers in a pile of questions
We feel lost yet there are so many directions
So many paths we could take
So many rules we have to break
Cause we are taught about the structure
The way things are built but not how they fracture 
How we are born with a chosen identity 
Defined by our gender and ethnicity 
Told that we must study to be on top
But now all we want to do is stop
Stop for a moment, pause, press rewind 
So we can breathe and have a chance to find 
Answers of the What ifs, Maybes and what do I do? 
Maybe there is something, anything, a clue 
Cause we have dreams and we have hopes 
But no one can teaches us how to cope
When life stills, when our dreams shatters 
What to do when you don’t even what matters
They told us in school that this is how life is 
But it’s not, there must have been something they missed 
They said that life is set and we will do fine 
Will have a degree and someone you can call mine 
Have a ring on your finger and a baby in hand 
Have life figured out but those people don’t understand 
Thinking we will die happy in our graves
But what if that’s not what God paved
Cause you failed high school, it was so tough 
You studied so hard but it’s wasn’t enough 
Got called dumb, you’re so stupid unlike the rest 
They all shout: you should have tried your best 
Fallen in love too many times, started to lose count 
Your heart been broken and mended over again, emotions start to mount 
You thought you had it- it lasted 4 years 
You chose to end it you’re covered in tears 
Believed so long that you’ll find your soulmate 
But then your heart whispers: what is it’s too late? 
Landed your first job at 21 at the grocery store 
Was so happy cause it will open more doors 
Been there for 2 years and you barely have no money 
So much for that degree, what are you doing with your life honey?
Your friends are married some have kids 
Then here are you not even knowing what you did 
What did you achieve from being so dumb
Where did Love take you apart from being numb 
What did life give you cause you are just stuck 
Asking you questions like do you give a fuck
Of course you do that’s why you continue on
Cause one mistake doesn’t mean you’re wrong 
One failure doesn’t mean you can’t succeed 
Wanting to be loved has nothing to do with greed 
Working a small job is hard for now but in 2 more years you will find 
That waiting patiently is a quality of a heart that is still kind 
Kind enough to let people in and strong enough to let it be broken 
Because though hardship and failure you will soon be outspoken 
On things you didn’t even know then and experiences you’ll cherish today 
And you’ll understand that maybe this was God’s way 
Of telling you to go at your own pace 
Take the downfalls and just embrace 
The little things coming together right before your eyes 
Of the tiny successes that life has disguised 
Cause you are breathing, look you’re alive 
And sooner or later, you will walk out there and thrive 
Sometimes life has a funny way of planning out 
Your story is being written and only you know what’s it about 
Take a step, be thankful and just live cause it’s not a crime 
Your life is yours so just take your time. 

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She had “that” Vibe

Ever had anyone who suddenly comes into your school and jumps into your friendship group like it was an okay thing to do? Well, I have (twice). I am a friendly person and is open to being kind to you and being friends with you. But after a while, she had a vibe about her. I am normally good at sensing people’s aura but I think there was a delay or something. She came to high school in the third year and she jumped into the friendship circle I was in. I was okay with her for a little bit and stayed friends with her until the end. But it was the little things she said to me and did that questioned how much of a friend she really is:

  • My first boyfriend broke up with me and she confessed later that she found him very cute and fancied him when she first started but saw he was with me and decided to stay away.
  • I told her that I fancy this guy in confidence and she went out to ask him out for me but ended up “accidentally” asking him out for herself.
  • We were supposed to be in a group for our final drama performance and she was telling me how she is extremely reluctant to work with this guy in our group. The day came when the drama teacher asked us to form our groups and I looked like a right idiot sitting there by myself when she moved to another group. She didn’t tell me anything about moving but she casually apologised a week later (like that makes it okay) *
  • I joked about her looking like one of the traffic lights when she wore a red dress to prom and she was sat next to two other people wearing orange and green (one of which was actually me). She didn’t like that and snubbed our table to hang out with other people for the rest of the event.
  • She moved to the Sixth Form college I went to and again (she did it twice!) hanged out with my friendship group I was in and acted like I was being distant. (I ended up leaving that friendship group after they all showed their true colours).
  • I invited her to my 18th birthday party, she sang me a song and at the end of the evening, she didn’t thank me and I haven’t heard from her since.

I know that when I had started having bad vibes about her that I should have walked away much sooner and not welcomed her as my friend. But seriously, if I had just walked away I would have been the one seen as bitchy and I didn’t want that. Also, I know that being an angsty teenager I tend to have bad days and so I thought maybe I was just reflecting my problems on her (my sister also admitted she got that vibe about her when I told her about this post) but I just had a gut feeling that I am right. This experience taught me to be cautious of people who claim to be my “friend” because sometimes their intentions are not real.

*I will post a follow-up story to explain more about this drama project and my ex-friend.

Blog Series for 2018

I know I haven’t been as active as I would like and I apologise for that with all my heart. I try my best to write and schedule posts when I can but I know I have been failing slightly on that front. That is why I have decided to open a series for this year that talks about my past adventures and things I have already discovered but haven’t shared with anyone. This probably defeats the purpose of this whole blog but right now, I feel compelled to write about the little things I still remember (before adulting fully takes over).

This series (still deciding on the name) will start on the 25th of February which marks my one year anniversary of The Undiscovered Adventures. It will talk about past relationships, friendships, conflicts etc… that are part of my life and the reason I made this blog in the first place. I have always been a quiet person and an introvert but I pride myself on being creative and I love telling stories. I have always wanted to do big things but recently I have come to realise that in order to do big things, I need to remember the small things first. I want to tell you my story on this platform, on my blog. I want to re-live my life as a 21 year old looking back on her life so far. I think that personally I am at the stage of my life where I tend to feel stuck and start to wonder more and more if maybe this is all life has for me but I can feel that there are so many opportunities available for me and many more adventures to discover and I can’t wait to see what’s to come.

So, please come and join me in revisiting past untold stories and finding out how these now discovered stories defined me, a 21 years old aspiring blogger who is going to make big things happen! Watch this space.

Peace and Love ✌🏽❤️

Trisha xox

The Influence of Women

I felt I needed to write about this not only because I am a woman but because there have been so many times I felt I have been silenced in fear of saying something wrong.

Over the last several months, the world has been discussing the sexual harassment accusations and scandals surrounding some of the most powerful and well-known men of the film industry. Men we have grown up idolizing with posters on our walls, men we have respected for so many years and careers we have followed and still do. Men have run the film industry for many many years and often we discuss men as directors, producers, cameramen, filmmakers and leading actors. Men have been praised for and paid more compared to women. Men get the better roles and to be honest most roles in the film industry. It wasn’t until recently that women have been getting publicity in term of their roles within the industry that is probably down to the topic of gender equality. 

Women have always been the supportive gender, never the leading. Women are expected to look pretty and be objectified because men say so. Women are expected to act in a certain way and never get in the way of men. But with these scandals and all because of a man named Harvey Weinstein, women are rewriting all the things they have never had the courage to do or say because they can. These brave women have been coming forward and finding their voices to talk about the most disgusting, most vile and most sickening things some men have been capable and frankly been allowed to do to them and their bodies. Forceful things. Demeaning things. Things we once thought were too taboo to talk about. Well not anymore. Women have found their voice and they are making a stand and as a woman, I find it so empowering and inspiring that this is happening right now. 

I cannot compare myself to what these women have been subjected to and I will not imagine the horrific things they had to do for men like Weinstein. I am saying that all men are horrible human beings because that would be an exaggeration to mine and other women’s stories. But there have been things in each of their stories that I can relate to. Most of my relationships have been good but I have come out of them as someone I barely recognised and not in a good way. There have been points in my relationships when I have been called a liar because I was 13 and told his friends he showed me his penis and they, of course, took his side. A time when I found out that he had been seeing someone else behind my back like I could be replaced in an instant. The times when I said no and he shakes his head like I’m the one in the wrong. Or when I begged him to stay and he brushed it off and said ‘we’re just not meant to be, you’ll find someone else’ and then comes back 3 months later telling me he loves me and I took him back. I loved them all but looking back, I never realised how dependent I was to hand them over the control, times when I knew I was right but bit my tongue in the fear I will get shut down anyway. I always took the blame and I always took them back because I am willing to compromise my feelings so they’ll stay in the same way these women were petrified in losing their jobs so they chose to compromise also. 

I feel so proud of these women and the change they are making to the world not only in defining gender but defining the power and influence of women. Six months ago, I ended a 4-year relationship with a guy I promised myself would be the one I wanted to marry. It was an amazing relationship and we had our ups and downs but we stuck by each other even though we were 3 hours apart for nearly 3 years. I ended it because he was moving to another country and I had to admit that it was not going to work out. He also told me that I never made effort and I should have taken his money and come visited him. He told me that I am in the wrong and we need to talk about this issue more often. I told him that I wish him good luck, I hope we meet each other again one day and then I broke up with him. I thought I would regret it and I felt so disappointed it ended kind of bitter but honestly, when I woke up the next morning, it was like a huge weight was lifted off me and I smiled so wholeheartedly.

Two months after that, the news about Weinstein came in and floods of women started to speak up and they continue to do so as evidenced by the Golden Globes last night. Six months on, I am writing to you about the influence of women and I can confidently say I made one of the best decisions in my life. I can breathe and laugh and I have never felt more me than I am today.

As Oprah said last night at the Golden Globes ‘A New Day is on the Horizon’ and damn I have a feeling we will see a lot of women in every new day!

 

Someone Loves You

There are lessons we need to learn
Yet we need the money to earn
So we can buy and we can strive
Living a life to prove we can survive
We grew older wishing we were small
Knowing that every step could lead to a fall
A fall that a kiss or a plaster cannot fix
And then having to inspect our bag of tricks
For a miracle or a hope, for our dream
Why can all we hear is the scream
Of our thoughts crying in pain
Of our hearts going insane
From all the feelings we have suppressed
Then people asking why are we depressed
They don’t understand what goes in our mind
Of all the dangerous moments that follows us behind
How we quiver in conflict and avoid fear
How we fake a smile and stop the tear
That could flood the bath and our lungs
How we drunk the bleach more than once
The times we held a knife or the rope
Praying for a single strand of hope
To take our hand and away from the edge
Of the glass, the pills or the ledge
To tell us that it will be okay
That one day the anxieties will go away
But for now, know that you and I are not alone
Please speak to someone and dial a number on your phone
Yesterday, Today or Tommorrow may not seem fine
But please talk to someone on the suicide helpline.


We all have anxieties and are going through a lot in our lives that can seem overwhelming. Please know that someone loves you and would be happy to listen to whatever you are going through, even if it is some stranger on the phone. There are a lot of information on the numbers you can call to reach the suicide helpline team in your country.

You are not alone, even if it feels like that now. You are loved. 

 

2018 New Year’s Resolutions

I am so sorry that I have been away for so long. As I always say, busy, busy, busy. The last two months of 2017 was so hectic that I have put this blog on the back burner. All the things I wanted to write about have either been half written or have titles and not written at all. So I apologise that I haven’t been as active as I would have liked to be. (end of apology) 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

I cannot believe that we survived 2017 and we are just a few days into 2018. A New Year means a lot of things. The New Year is the time many people will say: NEW YEAR, NEW ME. A time when we will be promising to lose weight, to travel the world or even create a new identity altogether. A time for making resolutions that cannot be resolved or semi-give up on it completely because let’s be honest, how long was it really going to last? 2018 is a new year for a clean slate and where we can do and say and think up new things for another 365 days. 

I have decided to do some resolutions this year because why not? and because I really wanted to get into the spirit of the New Year. I tried to pick resolutions that I know I can do and will actually accomplish. 

  1. Drink more water: I feel that I haven’t been that keen on drinking water (even though that is all I have ever drunk since I was a teenager because I was a good child who didn’t want to break the ‘NO SOFT DRINKS’ rule). I want to drink more water this year because I have heard it makes you have good skin and keeps you hydrated. The goal will be 1 glass when I wake up, 2 glasses after each meal and 1 glass before bed. 
  2. Exercise more: This is kind of linked to losing weight (because I have gained 4 kilos during the Christmas break thanks to my mom’s cooking) and I want to get back into shape and maybe lose more than I had before I gained some back. I am not going to put how often or a certain number to it (yet) but I definitely want to exercise more this year.
  3. Shut down Facebook (again): I had this revelation last year when I gave Facebook up for Lent2017 that I didn’t need FB as much as I thought I did. Plus I really think that Facebook should retire. I know that FB was cool at the start when it was being hyped up to be as big as My Space but now it has been meh! (I don’t even have the app on my devices anymore). Facebook owns other apps (like Instagram) that are fairing more in terms of audience participation and being a social media platform. I aim to shut Facebook down in time for Lent and move on to focus on my other social media accounts. 
  4. More Self Learning: I learnt a lesson from breaking up with someone last year and it is that I still have a lot to learn about myself. I have things to figure out and things I would like to do on my own (without the stress or hassle of having to worry about another person). This year will the year I will fully get to enjoy being single and finding out more about who I am and what I want to become. 
  5. More Blogging: I really want to make an effort to do more blogging and keep improving my blog and getting to meet other bloggers and readers. I think making connections is great and as a person who isn’t into physically travelling I want to still be able to travel but on the internet. I want to meet other people and get more ideas on what to write and just be able to share more undiscovered adventures with everyone.

So. that is my five resolutions for 2018 and hopefully, I will be able to stick to them. I hope you all have a lovely 2018. I am so excited for another year of blogging. 

Peace and Love, 

Trisha xox

Facebook Could Soon Face Extinction

Since coming back to Facebook after my detox for Lent 2017 and making a new account I have noticed a strange atmosphere to how people have been using (or should I say lack of using) the once-hyped social media platform. Back in my high school days, everyone were obsessed with turning 13 because that is the legal age to sign up for a Facebook account (even though most people would lie so they can make a profile even before they turn 13) and it was anticipated and cool once you have make a profile and made a lot of “friends”. I remember a time when my sister cried over the end of the world with the prime reason that she will never get the chance to sign up for Facebook (she hates it now haha).The social media platform took over from MySpace (which seems to be an ancient tale now in the more modern era) and it became a giant amongst other social media sites.

But now forward to present day and here I am more bored than ever with Facebook. No one is no longer on it 24/7 and those that are rarely post anything useful. People only post about major events like holidays or when they get pregnant or tied the knot. The games of FarmVille or Sims have already been forgotten and replaced with games that require you to interact with “friends” that you haven’t spoken to in 5 years. You end up liking random stuff after stuff and would scroll through hundreds of rubbish articles. It has become so repetitive that you groan at the screen every time your well-trained fingers automatically clicks on it. Facebook had tried so hard to keep up with the likes of Snapchat and Instagram when they included filters and Facebook stories (but unfortunately was too late in catching with the trends). I hate to be so pessimistic about this but soon I think Facebook will become extinct.

This will be probably not that surprising when it finally crashes down. Many people have been telling me that they will hardly miss it (even my parents refers to it as the evilest out of all the social media websites). I think Facebook has lived long enough and could very well join MySpace on the dark side of the online world. Give it another two years and maybe soon people will have forgotten this once loved social media phenomenon. I have come to realise that It was probably a bad mistake to make another account if I am just going to delete it again lol. Facebook could soon be joining the dinosaurs.

I mean think about it. Facebook has resulted in asking people for their nudes to ensure that those nude pictures don’t appear on their platform. Someone working at Facebook will be staring at your private areas and playing memory match in an instance that someone else (like a vengeful ex) posts it on Facebook. Think about it carefully.

Facebook will turn 14 next year (a year older than the required age for someone to sign up for the site) and I think it would be a good time for adolescent Facebook to retire or at least take a break.