~You will be rewarded with a Great Honour~

Today, I am going to be graduating with a FIRST CLASS HONOURS!!! I still cannot believe it that I got a First Class grade.When I first saw it, I couldn’t quite process it that I got a 69.83% (which just barely made the first class grade) and the words next to it had First Class Honours. I just kept staring at it and shaking my head and I was really speechless. I never thought I would see those words on the screen. I was very certain that I would get a 2:1 because I calculated it over and over again (hoping it would be a 1st class) but finally accepting that I shouldn’t have even thought about getting a high grade and I am just happy with a 2.1. I already told a lot of my family members that I will get a B and soon I was confident that I would get a 2.1 (which secretly made me feel disappointed) but I moved on and just accepted it.

But those words on the screen when I saw it really brought tears to my eyes. The three years have been a huge adventure and like I said before, it wasn’t the easiest or the most fun thing you could do in your life (at least for me lol)  but I took it as a chance to prove myself that I can do it and grow. I didn’t really get high grades so I wasn’t looking for the top grade at all and most of the lecturers/ tutors warned us that not a lot of people will get firsts, so I didn’t have high hopes for myself. I cruised through the first year and in the second year and cruised even further in my third year, hoping for at least a 2.1. As a person who also missed out on things, I like to keep to myself and just jump hoping to land safely at least a metre from the edge and I treated university the same way. I did my best and if it wasn’t enough then I had to accept it and move on. I never shared my grades with anyone (unless they ask) but it always plays over and over again in my mind that I will never get a top grade and that always stayed with me until the results day. I still cannot believe I got a First Class Honour!

Getting this grade means so much to me for several reasons. Firstly, as I mentioned above, I am not the person who was highly praised for being academically smart and most of my grades especially A-Levels was so crap. I even had my doubts if I will even make it into university. But now, I have officially finished on a high note and I couldn’t have been more proud of myself. After all the stress, crying, headaches and sleepless nights, I can now breathe a sigh of relief that I am officially finished with all the essays and I am officially finishing with a First Class Honours. All those times, I stood people up and told them I was too busy to meet them (cause I was doing some last minute essays lol), the times I shut myself in my room and forced Vanessa to stay with me during some of my all-nighters so I would have some company, the times she was annoying and told me ‘It will be fine, Trisha’ and ‘You need to calm down!’ (which followed with a pillow to her face and on one occasion I dug my nails into her arms- I said I was sorry and you can barely see the scarring hahaha) and the times I handed every essay in thinking that it is the best I could and it is up to God what grade I get. I am one of those people who doubted herself constantly and worried so much about the future but always kept it to myself cause I don’t want to bother people. People would tell me it would be fine and I will nod my head (even if deep down I doubt it will be lol) and just get on with things. I never thought of the possibility of getting a first in anything and even though I would get excited when I got a first in some of my essays, I tell myself that I need to tone down the excitement so I won’t be disappointed. But damn, I did it and got an unexpected First Class Honours.

Another reason this means so much to me is that getting a high grade means I have ticked off one of the things on my bucket list, which is graduating from university and graduating with the highest grade possible. I know that going to university is a privilege as my parents always tell us, education is something people cannot take away from you and something you can never lose. So many people dream of going to university and they cannot afford to, so I feel so blessed that I stuck with it and finished university. I know this also means so much to my family that I am going to be graduating and there are not enough words I can write and say to thank them enough for quietly supporting me.

To my parents, thank you for always pushing me to be the best I could be and showering me with all the things I want and need. My parents work so hard every day to earn money to pay for all the necessities of life and they never wanted anything back except the promise from us to work hard and be a good person. Nothing can ever repay the unconditional love my parents have given me all my life but I hope now that I am going to be graduating, I can share with them the pride of this great accomplishment and a toast to the start of a fruitful future that they have always believed I would have.

To my sisters, firstly to Vanessa, you have always been annoying and we have had a lot of fights and I am sure there are still more to come. You have always made fun of me (mostly about my ex-boyfriends) but you have also brought some fun into my life by being my volunteer PA by bringing all my stuff for me up and down the stairs. Even if I injured you in the process or told you to be quiet, I always appreciated your encouraging words and your willingness to help me realise that I can do it! To Beatrice, thank you for helping me make peace with my inner child. With all the stress, I was always so serious about getting things done to prove that I have become an adult but with all the times spent with you, you have helped me take a break from being all grown up and watch cartoons and play childish games I have missed so much (plus it gave me a reason not to do my essays).

To all my aunts, uncles and cousins, you have always been there with supportive advice and compliments and even if we do not get to see or speak to each other as much as we would like, I know you are cheering me on with great enthusiasm. To all my Lolas, you have taken care of me since I was little and watched me grow into the person I am now. You have passed on your wisdom to my parents and they have passed it on to me and that has helped shaped my values on life and the power of prayer. I know we don’t go to church as much as we should but I also know that all of you always pray for me, for my health, my happiness and for my studies. I am so glad that both of our prayers have been answered and I am graduating with the highest honours. I will send some pictures over so I can share the blessings that God has given me. To my late Lolo Al and Lolo Ramon, I am so sad that you can’t see me graduate but I hope you are looking down on me and are very proud.

To all the few friends that stuck with me since childhood and until now, thank you so much for making me realise the power of friendship and I appreciate all the support you have given me (even though I didn’t get to meet up or hang out as much as you would have liked me to come and meet up). I will try and make an effort to come hang out more hahaha. To all the friends I met at university, you have been amazing and I am sure our paths will cross again and you will go on to greater things. To all the lecturers that taught me, you have opened my eyes and ears about social issues from theories that seemed like from many years ago (that I would have normally not even realised existed or wanted to read) but those lessons will stay with me in my mind and has not only made me wiser but full of curiosity to discover more. 

After today I would be officially ending my university life with the highest grade and closing a huge chapter of my life. I cannot wait to see what the future has install for me. Let us toast to more undiscovered adventures that are now waiting to be discovered. 

Peace and Love, 

Trisha xo

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